Since the posting of this, I've written several posts on the search for my birth family- You can find links to them in chronological order below.
Okay , so where do I even begin??
After I got my birth certificate back in October, I took the leads offered me and got to work in earnest trying to find my birth family. If you follow this blog you'll have learned that a friend of mine suggested a Facebook group called Search Squad. So I signed up with them as well as registering on several websites set up to reunite adoptees and their birth families. As I continued my research in how to best continue the search I found several articles advising adoptees to register first and foremost at the ISRR Reunion Registry. I did so and then put it out of my mind.
On March 10th I received an email from one of their volunteers- a sweet woman called Mary. She told me that my birth father Isell had registered with them in 1999 and that he'd in his early eighties now. We compared notes and found that we were on the same track. She unearthed some new numbers, we both tried calling and emailing alas to no avail. It was incredibly heartening to have Mary on the case with me. She's smart, cheerful, funny and dogged in her pursuit.
When we couldn't seem to find answers regarding Isell she turned her attention to Shirley. Mary was so encouraging and hopeful; it felt wonderfully comforting having her on this journey with me.
Again we compared notes and on March 13th she came up with a new address I hadn't found. I wrote another snail mail letter and sent it off. I wrote Mary thanking her for her help and said we could re-engage on my return from the States.
Then Saturday morning after a late night gig I woke up, sleepy, slow to wake; still in bed I turned on my phone opened one eye and read this subject line. "Yes it's me"
Whaaaaaat???? Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaassssssssssssss So then my eldest sister Casandra emailed me..
And THEN-
AND THEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I spoke with my beautiful birth mother Shirley and my birth sisters Casandra (The one in the middle- take charge, smart, funny, silly Casandra and Rhonda (On Casandra's left) big-hearted, sweet, sensitive) Rhonda.
AND THEN LATER STILL!!!!!!! I spoke with Katherine (wonderfully sweet, kind, sensitive), Katherine (on Casandra's right in the photo of the three). My gorgeous gorgeous gorgeous birth sisters!
THEN ( I know it's cray cray right??!!)
My birth brother Dwayne leaves this under one of the videos from my last blog speaking of my search:
"I think you maybe my sister you can contact me at chiwat..."
He then sent me a beautiful, epic video made for my birth Grandmother Laura Berenice White Small who sadly just passed March 7. I am deeply saddened that I missed my chance at meeting her. How incredible to see some of her life represented.
It's a lot right?!
I am awed, I am joyous, I am grateful. I am moved.
Now as for Isell *rolling up my sleeves* ...
To be continued...
Posts on the search for my birth family in chronological order here:
womanly love, birth family search, & #AME
ta da! meet my birth mom shirley and my birth siblings
everything that came before - everything that is to come
sedaris you wish back from a deep deep dive part-3
first times - back from a deep deep dive part-4\
For non birth family-related musical meanderings and other essays